Let me clear the questions...NO we did not make our trip to Florida. Many things went into play on this change. And yes my van being UN FIXABLE was a factor...but as it turns out...we will be squeezing every bit of life out of it. If you see me on the side of the road...I might need help! I love that van, paid for, alot of trips and memories...so yes I got it back for what ever it has left to give me.
I think maybe I might pay dearly for doing step, arruns all day, cleaning all the floors in the house, and then biking for 14 miles...but I think the ride was worth it!
So I started by asking God if He would use the ride to...well meet with me. I continued "I'm aware that you are there when two or more or gathered". But asked if He would indulge me and maybe count my bike as one or...something. I think He agreed.
I normally do not listen to head phones when exercising like that alone...but I thought it worth the "danger". I put on praise music and just listened. I couldn't bring myself to sing many of the words.
I've been asking myself this question...cause a dear friend advised me to...Who am I? Thanks S.H....but I'm having a hard time with this exercise. You said look in the mirror and be honest with yourself. So I've been trying to see really when you take the walls down, and Lord knows I keep those up. When you set aside the "I must be holier than thou". I must never let my deep darkest sins be known. Not even to the body of Christ, cause well I've heard enough gasping in the past when (what I thought would be my worst sin) known. Take the Sunday make-up off. The labels of mom, wife, choir member and even Christian. Maybe I went a step too far there but stay with me. Who am I? What is my natural make-up inside. Not the fake stuff. The choir brat, the choir clown, the VBS worker...I could go on and on. I still have not found an answer. Sorry...I will search till it is found.
I got something else out of my ride...In what might be the best church service because, well there's no one to gasp. God doesn't, He knows all and yet still loves me, makes His grace new EVERYDAY, not just on Sunday's! I love that. Even more His grace is new every moment. Which personally I need right now.
I asked God why do I do stupid things? Not the stupid things I do to make everyone laugh and think that I have it all together, I mean the secret sins and failures that I seem to half accept His grace for cause well, I can't forgive myself. He took me a different route.
As I rolled over the trail. It starts out slightly downward. We move along nicely. Quickly these cracks and breaking of the trail come along from the roots of the trees on the side. We think the trees are a blessing...and sometimes they are! But other times, their roots (the roots of our past) will cause a few dumps when we least expect it. These trees can be blessings and the roots pop up so we can use them to help others. Sometimes the roots come up, and it's defeat. The past coming back to catch us off guard and cause problems. God allows them to come up, breaking through our smooth ride cause it's then, that He wants us to face the roots of the past. Deal with, learn from and let go of. Just when we thought we were past it all. There is another type of root though. The root and crack caused from sin in our past or present lives. Maybe sin we thought we got past, or sin we thought we could hide. Ya know Jamey Ragle said "if you think you will not get caught in your sin, you would be THE ONLY ONE who didn't get caught." True. Maybe not today, or even months but some day, you will get caught.
So what do we do with that? I kept asking..."Lord seriously, Your going to forgive me for something I go over and over again?" Ya know...somehow He whispered the words, "if my blood could not cover THIS sin, how could it cover ANY sin?" Good question. Boy our Father is a tough lover isn't He.
I'd like to say I got through with that conversation with Christ, but He and I are going to need some more dialogue before that conversation is over, understood, accepted and taken to heart. I thought it worth sharing anyway.
After the sermon, we had the Lord's supper. Bugs flying in the mouth were...the body of Christ. Tears and sweat, were the blood of Christ. I just thought that was funny.
I hung onto the last praise song...as I rode the bike and didn't try to find anymore words, just trying to grasp what He had already laid in my lap...words I needed as a encouragement than I can step forward from here. My prayer as I ended my ride and got in the van to pray (out load) all the way to get the girls...came from that last song.
Lord, when all my hope is lost...I will call You Savior.
When pain surrounds...I will call You Healer
When silence falls (as it has alot this week)...I'll ask that You be the Song in my heart.
Abba Father, thank you for your presence no matter where we are. I have felt Your hands holding me tightly this week. Even when I couldn't speak a word to pray, You accepted my silence cries. You gifted me this week in spite of my circumstance. You even lead me to the right women of Christ to be the circle around me. In that was a brand new friendship that only You could have formed. As You prepared us both, months before we would actually take the step toward each other. I thank you for Your love in tough times. Help me to remain ever mindful of Your love for me. How YOU see me and not how others see me. Help me as I continue to find the whole truth of who I am.
Your troubled child,
Candy
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Then my response back...
Wow, I hate to hear that so many were loss this season. I remember we said we had to have at least 50 families to operate so yea 30 is way below the amount needed.
Please note I reached out to you for some answers to help those that have asked if I could see a way to keep it going that maybe you did not. But I am in full agreement with this info that there is no possible way to keep the gym going.
I do appreciate all the hard work you did for the program and have been very proud of how things have been going.
I do wish you all the luck as you start a new chapter.
No I really am not interested in getting back into this sport. Like I said I was searching for answers to be able to give advice...I might would consider it if there was enough families involved and the gym was just in need of someone to run it with coaches staying in place.
My girls are getting ready to turn 7. I have prayed they would not choose cheerleading and they have not even considered it. Even having friends in their class that were at CX, they never thought about going that way.
They are into voice, piano, comp swim with the Y and T-ball. As you could imagine I have no time for anything else. Swim is 4 days a week, 2 hours a day! We had to do swim 2 years ago to help with asthma but they fell in love with it and it really does wonders for the asthma.
The Markey's should have no problem selling the building. I would maybe reach out to Forest Dance Academy. They had looked at that land prior to us. I know they were concerned about moving in a different county but now that the building is in place they may really bite on it. If I remember correctly that building can really be changed to meet anyone's needs. Forest Dance NEEDS the space and could easily add a second level with many dance rooms. Just a thought.
Thanks for taking the time to respond. And thank you more for all you did for CX. It really was a great gift to the community while it lasted!
Candy
Please note I reached out to you for some answers to help those that have asked if I could see a way to keep it going that maybe you did not. But I am in full agreement with this info that there is no possible way to keep the gym going.
I do appreciate all the hard work you did for the program and have been very proud of how things have been going.
I do wish you all the luck as you start a new chapter.
No I really am not interested in getting back into this sport. Like I said I was searching for answers to be able to give advice...I might would consider it if there was enough families involved and the gym was just in need of someone to run it with coaches staying in place.
My girls are getting ready to turn 7. I have prayed they would not choose cheerleading and they have not even considered it. Even having friends in their class that were at CX, they never thought about going that way.
They are into voice, piano, comp swim with the Y and T-ball. As you could imagine I have no time for anything else. Swim is 4 days a week, 2 hours a day! We had to do swim 2 years ago to help with asthma but they fell in love with it and it really does wonders for the asthma.
The Markey's should have no problem selling the building. I would maybe reach out to Forest Dance Academy. They had looked at that land prior to us. I know they were concerned about moving in a different county but now that the building is in place they may really bite on it. If I remember correctly that building can really be changed to meet anyone's needs. Forest Dance NEEDS the space and could easily add a second level with many dance rooms. Just a thought.
Thanks for taking the time to respond. And thank you more for all you did for CX. It really was a great gift to the community while it lasted!
Candy
Yes I got a response from Tim here it is...
Candy,
Thank you for your concern and thoughts about the program. The issues that we are having are this...........Last year we ended the season with 90 kids in the program.........This year at tryouts we had 30 sign up and we have added as well as lost kids during the last 3 months. We can not operate in this facility with only 35 kids, we have to have 70 in this program to break even. We have spent countless numbers of hours trying to add classes, do different things, or offer more. None of which has been received very well. The economy is a very real issue to a lot of the parents of our program. It is an expensive sport and the cost does not get cheaper with a poor economy.
We have had the same fees since you were here, with the exception of adding competition fees, and having the kids pay for the uniform and components, we have not raised fees in 7 years. However, parents are having a tough time paying. Also, the schools are making kids choose, not all the schools, but the majority. This is really what has killed us......We have never made the children choose between us or them, we have always worked with the schools. Now they want them more focused and not spread thin, which I understand and dis agree with at the same time. LAGPT has also made a rule that if you train there, you can not compete here. The biggest issue is that the HS teams and the local gyms are all competing for the same kids!!! For some reason we are coming out on the losing side. We simple do not have enough money comin in to even cover the rent on this building..............The last three months we have tried, yet it just seems it is not meant to be.
As far as starting another gym...................TOUGH in this economy, not to mention the new All in 2 Air place is supposedly having a team this year starting August. Not sure who is running it, some girl from Florida, but it is going to be tough for them. Rumor is they are telling people they will have 8 teams................We both know that is not going to happen.
Amber and I own the business, and we are closing it down. We have no intentions of selling the business, however the Markeys are selling the building. They own the building and it is now for sale.
We have strived to run a AWESOME program and have succeded, however now the economy is crushing us. Last year we had our first level 5 team and they beat some top gyms across the country, IT'S SO SAD TO COME TO AN END!!
As far as the phone call...............who knows???!! Kinda confused at that myself, not to mention that I don't even recall that ever happening.
With HHS, I'm not sure what happened, I know I left because I didn't want to have ties to any schools in the area...........didn't want to be accused of having "favorites"
Not sure if that answers everything for you or not. All in 2 Air is starting a program, they may be looking for coaches if you are interested in getting back into it........Some of our coaches will be going over, not sure how many!
Thanks Candy,
Tim
Thank you for your concern and thoughts about the program. The issues that we are having are this...........Last year we ended the season with 90 kids in the program.........This year at tryouts we had 30 sign up and we have added as well as lost kids during the last 3 months. We can not operate in this facility with only 35 kids, we have to have 70 in this program to break even. We have spent countless numbers of hours trying to add classes, do different things, or offer more. None of which has been received very well. The economy is a very real issue to a lot of the parents of our program. It is an expensive sport and the cost does not get cheaper with a poor economy.
We have had the same fees since you were here, with the exception of adding competition fees, and having the kids pay for the uniform and components, we have not raised fees in 7 years. However, parents are having a tough time paying. Also, the schools are making kids choose, not all the schools, but the majority. This is really what has killed us......We have never made the children choose between us or them, we have always worked with the schools. Now they want them more focused and not spread thin, which I understand and dis agree with at the same time. LAGPT has also made a rule that if you train there, you can not compete here. The biggest issue is that the HS teams and the local gyms are all competing for the same kids!!! For some reason we are coming out on the losing side. We simple do not have enough money comin in to even cover the rent on this building..............The last three months we have tried, yet it just seems it is not meant to be.
As far as starting another gym...................TOUGH in this economy, not to mention the new All in 2 Air place is supposedly having a team this year starting August. Not sure who is running it, some girl from Florida, but it is going to be tough for them. Rumor is they are telling people they will have 8 teams................We both know that is not going to happen.
Amber and I own the business, and we are closing it down. We have no intentions of selling the business, however the Markeys are selling the building. They own the building and it is now for sale.
We have strived to run a AWESOME program and have succeded, however now the economy is crushing us. Last year we had our first level 5 team and they beat some top gyms across the country, IT'S SO SAD TO COME TO AN END!!
As far as the phone call...............who knows???!! Kinda confused at that myself, not to mention that I don't even recall that ever happening.
With HHS, I'm not sure what happened, I know I left because I didn't want to have ties to any schools in the area...........didn't want to be accused of having "favorites"
Not sure if that answers everything for you or not. All in 2 Air is starting a program, they may be looking for coaches if you are interested in getting back into it........Some of our coaches will be going over, not sure how many!
Thanks Candy,
Tim
Thursday, June 25, 2009
An end to a gift to our community
First, I'm so sorry to hear about Cheer Xtreme closing. It is odd but since I started CX and even though I have not been apart of the program for what I think is 5 years...I still feel a part of me will be missing. Knowing the hard work to get that program up and running and fighting through things when we didn't have a place of our own, all the sweat into getting advertisement into the schools and community and on and on I could go...it's just sad to see it end.
I was proud of the work Tim did. He did a great job and I was very happy about all he brought to the table...before and after my being apart of it all. I know very few of the families left in the program...but to those I do know...I'm sorry it had to end.
To the ones that have asked me if there is anything I could do to help it stay open...I refer you to the letter I sent to Tim this evening. As I told you, I know nothing so I can not even offer up ideas without knowing the answers to many questions. I asked a few of those, but so much more info would be needed to make a educated thought of how to keep CX going for our community.
VHSL offers some of the cheer athletes in our area a great venue to learn, build and advance in the sport of cheerleading. I hate that not all schools offer this, but maybe this will change with time.
I wish you all the best of luck in your cheer careers and all areas of you lives. Hopefully CX leaves you with great discipline, determination and dedication to advance in life as a whole!
Candy
I was proud of the work Tim did. He did a great job and I was very happy about all he brought to the table...before and after my being apart of it all. I know very few of the families left in the program...but to those I do know...I'm sorry it had to end.
To the ones that have asked me if there is anything I could do to help it stay open...I refer you to the letter I sent to Tim this evening. As I told you, I know nothing so I can not even offer up ideas without knowing the answers to many questions. I asked a few of those, but so much more info would be needed to make a educated thought of how to keep CX going for our community.
VHSL offers some of the cheer athletes in our area a great venue to learn, build and advance in the sport of cheerleading. I hate that not all schools offer this, but maybe this will change with time.
I wish you all the best of luck in your cheer careers and all areas of you lives. Hopefully CX leaves you with great discipline, determination and dedication to advance in life as a whole!
Candy
My letter to Tim McTee
Tim,
I hate to keep sending messages...I have done my best to leave you be. I have a few questions...if you could take the time to answer them I would be grateful.
Why are you closing the gym? I mean I know your leaving town and all. But seriously, with the amount of families you had involved were you not making enough to run it? Seriously?
You had many coaches under your wings, did you not? None of them or a few of them together, could not take it on and keep it going for the community?
Now I'm stepping over the line but I HAVE to ask...Are the Markey's paid off? Are they still apart of things?
Now I'm going a step further and throwing myself under the bus...mainly cause I have no response to the people that ask me, since your news and asked if I could do something...and no I'm not sure I want to. I have moved on so much and to go back seems...not ideal..in my minds view at this moment.
But the coaches you have, would they stay if the gym had someone that was allowed and willing to take it over? AGAIN Understand me..I am NOT saying I WILL. I'm trying to find all the options to offer those that have asked me. And as I told them, I would never expect you to agree to that...meaning my return. Just trying to give them options as I told them I had NO ideas for them cause I know NOTHING. Which is fine...but I am trying for their sake to give them some ideas to keep it going.
Tim I have enough on my plate. But I was proud of the fact that CX was started by me and though I messed things up for myself...CX was still going and thriving under your care! I hate to see the community lose it. THIS and ONLY THIS reason is why I'm stepping out and asking a few questions.
I have on more question. This has NOTHING to do with CX. It has been bothering me for years though. Your going to have to think back...but I'd like to know...the year you took over HHS. I came to the district comp. HHS did not do well. I got a call a short time after...the call came TO MY CELL FROM CX GYM. I did not make it to the phone. Michael called the number back and found out it was the gym. I ignored. The time of the call was during school hours. SO it doesn't take a genius to figure out none of the kids called me. Why the call? Very curious. Especially cause I still to this day have no idea why I am not coaching at HHS. I was questioned on several things but had answers for them all. I was told about 4 different stories on my release from the program. I don't care any more. Anything I did wrong at CX was personal mistakes and not professional mistakes. But I'm not going to argue all that. I've been through all the medical areas to accept everything and deal with the issues. As I said, I've move on SO far since then, there are no words.
Well, in expecting a rampage with this email...I am going to post it for all who want or care to know what I have to say. It can serve to prove my promise to seek some answers to help provide ideas to keep CX going and so all will know what I said without having a he said she said thing going on.
I wish you and your family the best! Charlotte All-stars is a second home to you both and I have no doubts the talent you will add. I saw them perform several times this year and they are awesome as ever. The LU cheer community has felt the loss of you talent and now, the CX community will feel it as well!
Thank you for carrying the program this far. You did a great job! The last 7 years were great for all involved!
God Bless,
Candy Justice
I hate to keep sending messages...I have done my best to leave you be. I have a few questions...if you could take the time to answer them I would be grateful.
Why are you closing the gym? I mean I know your leaving town and all. But seriously, with the amount of families you had involved were you not making enough to run it? Seriously?
You had many coaches under your wings, did you not? None of them or a few of them together, could not take it on and keep it going for the community?
Now I'm stepping over the line but I HAVE to ask...Are the Markey's paid off? Are they still apart of things?
Now I'm going a step further and throwing myself under the bus...mainly cause I have no response to the people that ask me, since your news and asked if I could do something...and no I'm not sure I want to. I have moved on so much and to go back seems...not ideal..in my minds view at this moment.
But the coaches you have, would they stay if the gym had someone that was allowed and willing to take it over? AGAIN Understand me..I am NOT saying I WILL. I'm trying to find all the options to offer those that have asked me. And as I told them, I would never expect you to agree to that...meaning my return. Just trying to give them options as I told them I had NO ideas for them cause I know NOTHING. Which is fine...but I am trying for their sake to give them some ideas to keep it going.
Tim I have enough on my plate. But I was proud of the fact that CX was started by me and though I messed things up for myself...CX was still going and thriving under your care! I hate to see the community lose it. THIS and ONLY THIS reason is why I'm stepping out and asking a few questions.
I have on more question. This has NOTHING to do with CX. It has been bothering me for years though. Your going to have to think back...but I'd like to know...the year you took over HHS. I came to the district comp. HHS did not do well. I got a call a short time after...the call came TO MY CELL FROM CX GYM. I did not make it to the phone. Michael called the number back and found out it was the gym. I ignored. The time of the call was during school hours. SO it doesn't take a genius to figure out none of the kids called me. Why the call? Very curious. Especially cause I still to this day have no idea why I am not coaching at HHS. I was questioned on several things but had answers for them all. I was told about 4 different stories on my release from the program. I don't care any more. Anything I did wrong at CX was personal mistakes and not professional mistakes. But I'm not going to argue all that. I've been through all the medical areas to accept everything and deal with the issues. As I said, I've move on SO far since then, there are no words.
Well, in expecting a rampage with this email...I am going to post it for all who want or care to know what I have to say. It can serve to prove my promise to seek some answers to help provide ideas to keep CX going and so all will know what I said without having a he said she said thing going on.
I wish you and your family the best! Charlotte All-stars is a second home to you both and I have no doubts the talent you will add. I saw them perform several times this year and they are awesome as ever. The LU cheer community has felt the loss of you talent and now, the CX community will feel it as well!
Thank you for carrying the program this far. You did a great job! The last 7 years were great for all involved!
God Bless,
Candy Justice
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Play doh
I know I know, it's been 4 months...so sorry. Been a lot going on.
I thought I'd try to get back in the hang of blogging again. So here goes...
I was playing with play doe with the girls today. I was trying to be creative and make a dog or something and I never could get that ball of doe to turn into anything that looked worth writing home about. Maybe that's why someone invented play doe you can eat! When you get frustrated with it, just eat it. I wonder if that really taste good. I don't know...seems after playing with it for a while...just doesn't sound all that tasty.
As I got frustrated though, somehow I was reminded of Jeremiah 18:6 "Like clay in the hand of the potter, so are you in My hand." I don't know about you, but I know I cause A LOT of frustration for God. I often find myself feeling sorry for Him. Does this happen to anyone else?
Sometimes I wish He would just write a blue print out of how He sees us and how He wants us to be. I know I'm far from the mark. Yet He says He will never leave us nor forsake us. I was quick to throw the handful of play doe back in the bin and call it a day.
Can you imagine though, all He goes through to shape us. The love He must have to be patient and understanding of our failures and stubbornness. How heart breaking it must be for the Father to spend so much time and with one thought or act, we crumble in His hands, leaving Him with nothing to do but start all over again.
It bothers me to even look back on the past 24 hours of thoughts and actions I have done to break the mold. Thank you Lord for grace! Grace that can pardon within and make us whole again. Thank you Father for the Cross where you covered every sin we have committed or will commit.
Lord keep me ever mindful of Your hands at work in my life. Though the molding can be painful at times, help me to trust in You and lean on Your understanding and not my own. Forgive and cleanse me. Help me to become what You long for me to be.
Good night my Lion of Judah!
I thought I'd try to get back in the hang of blogging again. So here goes...
I was playing with play doe with the girls today. I was trying to be creative and make a dog or something and I never could get that ball of doe to turn into anything that looked worth writing home about. Maybe that's why someone invented play doe you can eat! When you get frustrated with it, just eat it. I wonder if that really taste good. I don't know...seems after playing with it for a while...just doesn't sound all that tasty.
As I got frustrated though, somehow I was reminded of Jeremiah 18:6 "Like clay in the hand of the potter, so are you in My hand." I don't know about you, but I know I cause A LOT of frustration for God. I often find myself feeling sorry for Him. Does this happen to anyone else?
Sometimes I wish He would just write a blue print out of how He sees us and how He wants us to be. I know I'm far from the mark. Yet He says He will never leave us nor forsake us. I was quick to throw the handful of play doe back in the bin and call it a day.
Can you imagine though, all He goes through to shape us. The love He must have to be patient and understanding of our failures and stubbornness. How heart breaking it must be for the Father to spend so much time and with one thought or act, we crumble in His hands, leaving Him with nothing to do but start all over again.
It bothers me to even look back on the past 24 hours of thoughts and actions I have done to break the mold. Thank you Lord for grace! Grace that can pardon within and make us whole again. Thank you Father for the Cross where you covered every sin we have committed or will commit.
Lord keep me ever mindful of Your hands at work in my life. Though the molding can be painful at times, help me to trust in You and lean on Your understanding and not my own. Forgive and cleanse me. Help me to become what You long for me to be.
Good night my Lion of Judah!
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Girls Follow Up DR Apt
Hello all. Just a quick note to update on the girls and their follow up appointment today. I promised the girls I was all theirs tonight so. I'll make this short and put other pieces in later.
We had our follow up appointment today. The girls O2 stats even with not being sick with the flu...still sat in the mid to high 80's. Again suppose to be 95. The doctor filled the paper work out for me to take to the school. They will be homebound. For those that do not understand this. Cause I didn't understand it till a few weeks and ago..and never heard of it. NO I will not be homeschooling them. Are you kidding none of us would survive that. The county school systems will appoint a teacher to come to our home one hour a day to teach the girls. My girls are very upset about this. They LOVE school and want to be with their friends. I am concerned about their lack of social skills. I mean with them being twins they are very tight and in some circles stick together, tuning everyone else out. Their lack of social skills is one of the main reasons they are in T-1 and not first grade this year. Now that social time is being taken away all
together. Yes when they get better we can return to church...but have been advised not to push that till the winter months are over. Which I hate cause we have not been able to be in church since this summer. With Michael's proceedor this summer, my depression and hospitalizations, the girls sickness on and off and their hospitalizations....I mean TRBC from the bed on Sunday mornings are great but...without true fellowship it's difficult. We all long for that fellowship again. But can't risk the girls health to be there for that.
Anyway, please continue to pray. This homebound is going to be a tough pill to swalloe for all of us. This also means I must make their days at home more productive during the day. Which means we will have to use more expenses to make this happen. What I mean by that is that the DR wants to get them to the YMCA for programs that help kids with asthma learn to live with their illness. She STRONGLY suggested both girls take swim lessons all year. This will help build up their lungs. We have a YMCA membership but with us paying $700 a month on meds for the girls and I...that extra $70 dollars a month is difficult to add back in. So I froze our YMCA membership for the time being.
The Miley Cyrus song The Climb is so perfect for the girls right now. All three of us are in love with that song. It's on in the back ground. Anyway. That was a bunny trail.
We covet your prayers so much during this time. Our church family has been such a great support. We love you all and hope that God will bless you all in return for your faithfulness to bless us in all the ways you have.
Trying to stay calm in the storm,
Michael and Candy Justice
LeAnn and Terra
We had our follow up appointment today. The girls O2 stats even with not being sick with the flu...still sat in the mid to high 80's. Again suppose to be 95. The doctor filled the paper work out for me to take to the school. They will be homebound. For those that do not understand this. Cause I didn't understand it till a few weeks and ago..and never heard of it. NO I will not be homeschooling them. Are you kidding none of us would survive that. The county school systems will appoint a teacher to come to our home one hour a day to teach the girls. My girls are very upset about this. They LOVE school and want to be with their friends. I am concerned about their lack of social skills. I mean with them being twins they are very tight and in some circles stick together, tuning everyone else out. Their lack of social skills is one of the main reasons they are in T-1 and not first grade this year. Now that social time is being taken away all
together. Yes when they get better we can return to church...but have been advised not to push that till the winter months are over. Which I hate cause we have not been able to be in church since this summer. With Michael's proceedor this summer, my depression and hospitalizations, the girls sickness on and off and their hospitalizations....I mean TRBC from the bed on Sunday mornings are great but...without true fellowship it's difficult. We all long for that fellowship again. But can't risk the girls health to be there for that.
Anyway, please continue to pray. This homebound is going to be a tough pill to swalloe for all of us. This also means I must make their days at home more productive during the day. Which means we will have to use more expenses to make this happen. What I mean by that is that the DR wants to get them to the YMCA for programs that help kids with asthma learn to live with their illness. She STRONGLY suggested both girls take swim lessons all year. This will help build up their lungs. We have a YMCA membership but with us paying $700 a month on meds for the girls and I...that extra $70 dollars a month is difficult to add back in. So I froze our YMCA membership for the time being.
The Miley Cyrus song The Climb is so perfect for the girls right now. All three of us are in love with that song. It's on in the back ground. Anyway. That was a bunny trail.
We covet your prayers so much during this time. Our church family has been such a great support. We love you all and hope that God will bless you all in return for your faithfulness to bless us in all the ways you have.
Trying to stay calm in the storm,
Michael and Candy Justice
LeAnn and Terra
Sunday, February 8, 2009
LeAnn and Terra Update
First THANK YOU ALL for your prayers most importantly, calls, cards, gifts, text, emails, visits, food, and everything else. Whether you know me or not, close to me or not, talked in the last few years or not...Our family has felt over whelmed with all the love. Your prayers have been felt as well.
Second, there are no words for the shower I was able to go home and take this afternoon. That was the first time I had left the hospital since Thursday. Thanks to Ed and Diana Parker for that much needed gift. I said that to say this....if you saw me in Target with a wet head, quickly filling a buggy and avoiding those I saw that we know....please forgive me and don't be mad. I was trying to get things to cheer the girls as well as things we needed here in the room. I did not want to keep the Parker too long. I too had to go get a cake at Kroger. See it's the 100th day of school tomorrow, Monday and the girls class is having a party with "Happy Cake". That's what my girls call it. So I had promised we would have our own 100th day party here. If we don't get out of here soon we will be celebrating my birthday and Valentines Day in here. But we will cross that bridge when we get there.
Let me answer the questions I have been asked alot.
Yes my girls have been sick on and off since October but no they have not been sick that WHOLE time. Yes LeAnn and I were here for Thanksgiving, me in VICU and LeAnn in peds...but no she has not been here since then and is not here for the same thing. Neither am I a patient at this time. The girls did have the stomach flu a few weeks back. This is not why we are here either. We had a few day break from that when this started.
Terra went to school Friday a week ago after having had the stomach flu, LeAnn stayed home just cause I wanted to give her another day and the weekend before returning. Terra began feeling sick at lunch that day. By that night she was dealing with a high fever and just yucky. LeAnn started feeling the same on Saturday afternoon. Called the DR Monday, was told don't bring them in. Lets make sure its not the 24 hour bug that is going around. Waited till Wednesday, took them in. They were tested for strep and flu. Negative for strep both positive with the flu. O2 (oxygen) was low. 90's for LeAnn and upper 80's for Terra. No typo YES Terra was worse than LeAnn. We decided to give them 24 hours with a triple dose of steriod to see if we could get the O2 up. They kept decreasing, ended in the ER at general for hours and transfered to Baptist, via ambulance.
WHY on God's green earth do Peds have to go to the ER at general, knowing they will have to be transported to Baptist if admitted. Does a women in labor go to General. UH NO. Why, cause Mother/Baby and the birth center are at Baptist. So WHY would they not treat Peds the same????????? O that's right...how can we get the MOST money from our patients??? Of course make them go to one hospital, pay those doctors, for the room and what you use in it, the works, then pay for the ambulance (by the way did you know that's $600 dollars for an ambulance?). Then you will pay for another set of doctors, another room, and all you use here too. WRONG, it's just wrong I tell you.
Now I am not going to go through all the ups and downs that we have had the past 4 days. I'm sorry for those that are not included in the people that are in my cell and that I know have text...I was sending 3-4 text a day to those people. I have had only my phone to check email and facebook. Now I have the computer so...
Most know that Terra had a major turn for the worst Friday night. Friday night and Saturday were the worst of all of this. We saw the lowest number for O2 that we have ever seen for our girls. Terra had a 81 stat. For those that do not know, our doctor like a 95, anything below that they do like to admit them. Terra went through alot Saturday. At one point in the early afternoon, Terra asked for another breathing treatment. It had only been 30 minutes since her last one. I called the nurse, they were having a code blue on the peds floor so of course that was being taken care of first. NO COMPLAINT. Terra was breathing and had O2 goin so. LeAnn pulled her O2 out of the wall by accident. So I walked across the room to help her with that. Terra called for me to come back. No sooner than I turned around to walk back to her, she turned white as a sheet and fell out of the bed. She hit her head on the wall and landed on her knees. I paged the nurse in a panic...which they were not use to hearing from our room. I couldn't even get Terra up before there were 12 people in our room. They looked her over from head to toe. Asked Terra and I twice what happened. I had to fill out a form, they checked for a concusion...then this conversation like one on House started happening between this older doctor and 4 resident doctors. Fine for TV but not what you want happening for you family. They ran test and more test, uped meds, changed meds, we finally started seeing improvement in Terra late Saturday.
LeAnn this whole time has been very lethargic and uncaring about what she needs to do to get better. I truly think that LeAnn has had enough of this mess for 7 years. So she looks worse than Terra but her stats have been better than Terra's. UNTIL late Saturday night. LeAnn took her turn to drop quickly. She never got to an 81 her lowest was 83. It was so frustrating. We went through everything EXCEPT the falling out of bed, with LeAnn, same as we did on Terra. Keep in mind LeAnn started 24 hours after Terra.
So now at 11pm on Saturday, I have both girls asleep. Their stat has dropped a little cause they are in deep sleep but this is normal. Neither of them are on O2 right now. We need to keep it that way for 24 hours. Then we can recheck with a chest xray and talk about when we can get out here. Like every night we've been here...as soon as I was done with bed baths, teeth brushed, hair brushed, room cleaned, story read, prayers said by the girls....I prayed over my girls.
My hearts cry tonight is that they will maintain the 91 O2 stat. It's not 95 but we have come so far. SO I will take the 91. Praying that God will continue to heal with no more slips backwards. I want with all my heart to believe that we are on the up and up but when you've been back and forth for 10 days where Terra has a bad day, then LeAnn has bad day, and flip flop this whole time...you start to doubt. Not doubt God, but doubt or have a false hope that we are nearing the end of it all.
Where's is Michael? Poor guy started getting sick with flu like symptoms Wedcnesday. I had my flu shot in the VICU but Michael has not had his. LeAnn and Terra have been trying to get them since October, how ever you can not have the shot when you are sick, on steriods or antibiotics so...that has not happened since October. Michael is feeling alot better today. But he had to leave to go out of town for work this afternoon and will not be back till the early hours of Tuesday morning.
As many of you are doing, please keep prayin. I am tired of my girls not being able to have a normal life as other kids. I had NO issues like this when I was young and neither did Michael. Breathing should not be a concern for a 7 year old. We are scheduled to have alot of specialist looking at the girls throughout the summer as this year has been their worst. SO we are hoping we will get some answers and find things that will make this all better.
God Bless You All, we can not thank you enough for everything.
In Christ Arms
The Justice Family
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
25 Things about Candy
Something I did on facebook that a few of you wanted to read cause you had read about it. So here I copied it for ya. You people are funny. I had no idea I was so entertaining!!!
25 things about Candy
25 things about Candy
I have copied and pasted this. Here are the rules, as they have been passed on to me. If you are tagged in this note, you must write your own list of 25 random things about yourself (random facts, goals, habits, etc. about yourself,) (or 26, or 27 if you can't stop) then tag 25 (or less )of your friends in said list (include the person that tagged you in their note.) If I've tagged you - it means I would like to know more about you. Have fun!
1. Lets see if I can actually come up with 25 things about me that would even be remotely interesting to ANYONE
2. Down one I guess.....I'm naturally a red head. Strawberry Blonde
3. I was born and raised in Jacksonville, Florida..man I miss the beach. If Lynchburg had a body of water running through it even like the St. Johns River...I would be in heaven. I miss being on the water.
4. I have an older brother Chris, love him! We use to share the same initials. Christopher Michael (ANOTHER STINKIN MICHAEL) Green and Candace Marie Green. Yes my name was Candy Green. HA HA HA I think the name Michael should be banned from ever being used for maybe at least 90 years or so
5. Though I LOVED and thrived off of the sport of cheerleading I wish I would have ran track or done swim team in addition. Which would have given me more discipline for staying in shape NOW...at this point I'm 31. Not likely to workout now days by "cheering"
6. I have two beautiful twin daughters...and their middle names rhyme...not their first names. Terra Renee and LeAnn McKay. Terra is named after my best cousin Terra, her middle name actually is cause of a old friend Renee Mangham. Never told her that. Just reconnected with her on facebook so...Renee my daughters middle name was chosen because I always loved your name!!! You were also always a great person when I cheered and even my senior year when I didn't cheer. Not many were like that! LeAnn McKay just came from a book. I liked those names.
7. Man I'm only on 7.....I got married on September 11th in 1999. It was a funny date when we got married. But not so funny anymore. The date scares me to death. Especially since I had JUST brought twin girls into the world on September 4, 2001...then 6 short days later 9/11 happened. All I could do was stare at these two girls weighing less that 5 pounds and wondering what kind of world I just brought them into.
8. What I consider my greatest accomplishment aside from my girls and marriage...the year of One Heart Beat at HHS here in Lynchburg. That year I really stretched my talents in cheerleading. Did the choreography, Music and all....ALONE The program went from being no threat to any other school, to being one of the best in town and now none existent.
9. Second would be starting the wonderful program of Cheer Xtreme All-stars here in town. I'm not apart of it anymore, but my heart is there and I consider it a success because it is still going. I could have made a bad decision and stayed and risked killing it all. I knew the night I left that with no doubt I left it in good hands. I am proud of Tim and Amber and what they have made of it.
10. I am a member of the choir at Hyland Heights Baptist church. I love being invovled. I can't wait to get better and return! I'm the choir brat!!!!
11. I had my nose broken in a National Cheer Competition in high school. Angel Crawford, whom I also recently reconnected with on facebook, was SO excited about our performance that she was jumping like a chicken and elbowed me from the left side. When I'm at my thinnest...you can really see how my nose still curves!!!
12. I LOVE to cook. Love it! I have been taught by the greatest. My granny, and my two favorite aunts, Aunt Cindy and Aunt Millie. Just ask anyone that's had one of my steak dinners!!!! Ed Parker will testify!
13. Good heavens...this is hard....I got a puppy as my wedding present. Michael got him while I was at home preparing for the wedding and seeing my granny through heart surgery. So he went ahead and named him. He called him Dusty cause of his coat color. I then added the name Alan after my high school sweet heart Dustin Alan Baine. In no way was Dusty a dog...he was a gentleman. But it just flowed. I recently reconnected with Dusty too. Facebook as been a great source of reconnecting....Dusty (the dog) died a little over a year ago. I miss him. But God gave me Scooter Winston a pie-bold dashund who is his mommy's lil man.
14. I LOVE accounting. It's money how could you not love it!!!!
15. I love to remodel homes. Like paint and garden. No IDEA where that came from. No one else in my family does this.
16. I love action, chick flicks and scary movies. When the movies are REALLY scary I will laugh at the scariest parts. No idea why. I just do.
17. Italian and Mexican are foods that I MUST have once a week!!!!
18. I am OCD MAJOR. Everything has its place and it MUST be in it. I put my dishes away in a color pattern. Same with towels, clothes...everything. All foods in cabinets must be facing forward and in like foods. I fold my underwear and even the girls underwear. Anyone that knows how small a 30 pound girls underwear are will see the silliness in this.
19. I've been committed for clinical depression 3 times so far...I had a doctor in the ER VERY surprised by that cause I'm a devoted Christian. I'm Christian but I'm NOT perfect. That's a sad one...sorry I just think its funny how people gasp when you tell them that your a Christian and are in therapy and have been committed. God is still working on me...
20. My daughters have nick names LeAnn is tid-bit, she is SO tiny...Just air. Terra is pee-wee. No idea where the names came from just, something I started calling them.
21. I love bread over something sweet!!
22. My love language is gifts
23. I truly think I married the best man! He is SO patient with my...ways. Loving, ah-maz-ing Father, lover and friend. He is my everything. He has made me a better person.
24. Two more....um, lets see...my most spiritual and heart felt moment was being in the room as my granny passed on to her eternal home. Words can not describe this experience. Normally I would stay as far away as possible. Funeral homes, even caskets just freak me out. But I had no ill feelings being there by her bed side as she passed. Being in the hospice center for 8 days you truly get the idea of just how different those who know that they are Heaven Bound and those who are not...their passings are so different. Some would scream and cry the whole time and those "at peace" layed still in God's arms till their final breath.
25. My lil dashund can beat up our blood hound/lab...which is what he is doing right this moment....
1. Lets see if I can actually come up with 25 things about me that would even be remotely interesting to ANYONE
2. Down one I guess.....I'm naturally a red head. Strawberry Blonde
3. I was born and raised in Jacksonville, Florida..man I miss the beach. If Lynchburg had a body of water running through it even like the St. Johns River...I would be in heaven. I miss being on the water.
4. I have an older brother Chris, love him! We use to share the same initials. Christopher Michael (ANOTHER STINKIN MICHAEL) Green and Candace Marie Green. Yes my name was Candy Green. HA HA HA I think the name Michael should be banned from ever being used for maybe at least 90 years or so
5. Though I LOVED and thrived off of the sport of cheerleading I wish I would have ran track or done swim team in addition. Which would have given me more discipline for staying in shape NOW...at this point I'm 31. Not likely to workout now days by "cheering"
6. I have two beautiful twin daughters...and their middle names rhyme...not their first names. Terra Renee and LeAnn McKay. Terra is named after my best cousin Terra, her middle name actually is cause of a old friend Renee Mangham. Never told her that. Just reconnected with her on facebook so...Renee my daughters middle name was chosen because I always loved your name!!! You were also always a great person when I cheered and even my senior year when I didn't cheer. Not many were like that! LeAnn McKay just came from a book. I liked those names.
7. Man I'm only on 7.....I got married on September 11th in 1999. It was a funny date when we got married. But not so funny anymore. The date scares me to death. Especially since I had JUST brought twin girls into the world on September 4, 2001...then 6 short days later 9/11 happened. All I could do was stare at these two girls weighing less that 5 pounds and wondering what kind of world I just brought them into.
8. What I consider my greatest accomplishment aside from my girls and marriage...the year of One Heart Beat at HHS here in Lynchburg. That year I really stretched my talents in cheerleading. Did the choreography, Music and all....ALONE The program went from being no threat to any other school, to being one of the best in town and now none existent.
9. Second would be starting the wonderful program of Cheer Xtreme All-stars here in town. I'm not apart of it anymore, but my heart is there and I consider it a success because it is still going. I could have made a bad decision and stayed and risked killing it all. I knew the night I left that with no doubt I left it in good hands. I am proud of Tim and Amber and what they have made of it.
10. I am a member of the choir at Hyland Heights Baptist church. I love being invovled. I can't wait to get better and return! I'm the choir brat!!!!
11. I had my nose broken in a National Cheer Competition in high school. Angel Crawford, whom I also recently reconnected with on facebook, was SO excited about our performance that she was jumping like a chicken and elbowed me from the left side. When I'm at my thinnest...you can really see how my nose still curves!!!
12. I LOVE to cook. Love it! I have been taught by the greatest. My granny, and my two favorite aunts, Aunt Cindy and Aunt Millie. Just ask anyone that's had one of my steak dinners!!!! Ed Parker will testify!
13. Good heavens...this is hard....I got a puppy as my wedding present. Michael got him while I was at home preparing for the wedding and seeing my granny through heart surgery. So he went ahead and named him. He called him Dusty cause of his coat color. I then added the name Alan after my high school sweet heart Dustin Alan Baine. In no way was Dusty a dog...he was a gentleman. But it just flowed. I recently reconnected with Dusty too. Facebook as been a great source of reconnecting....Dusty (the dog) died a little over a year ago. I miss him. But God gave me Scooter Winston a pie-bold dashund who is his mommy's lil man.
14. I LOVE accounting. It's money how could you not love it!!!!
15. I love to remodel homes. Like paint and garden. No IDEA where that came from. No one else in my family does this.
16. I love action, chick flicks and scary movies. When the movies are REALLY scary I will laugh at the scariest parts. No idea why. I just do.
17. Italian and Mexican are foods that I MUST have once a week!!!!
18. I am OCD MAJOR. Everything has its place and it MUST be in it. I put my dishes away in a color pattern. Same with towels, clothes...everything. All foods in cabinets must be facing forward and in like foods. I fold my underwear and even the girls underwear. Anyone that knows how small a 30 pound girls underwear are will see the silliness in this.
19. I've been committed for clinical depression 3 times so far...I had a doctor in the ER VERY surprised by that cause I'm a devoted Christian. I'm Christian but I'm NOT perfect. That's a sad one...sorry I just think its funny how people gasp when you tell them that your a Christian and are in therapy and have been committed. God is still working on me...
20. My daughters have nick names LeAnn is tid-bit, she is SO tiny...Just air. Terra is pee-wee. No idea where the names came from just, something I started calling them.
21. I love bread over something sweet!!
22. My love language is gifts
23. I truly think I married the best man! He is SO patient with my...ways. Loving, ah-maz-ing Father, lover and friend. He is my everything. He has made me a better person.
24. Two more....um, lets see...my most spiritual and heart felt moment was being in the room as my granny passed on to her eternal home. Words can not describe this experience. Normally I would stay as far away as possible. Funeral homes, even caskets just freak me out. But I had no ill feelings being there by her bed side as she passed. Being in the hospice center for 8 days you truly get the idea of just how different those who know that they are Heaven Bound and those who are not...their passings are so different. Some would scream and cry the whole time and those "at peace" layed still in God's arms till their final breath.
25. My lil dashund can beat up our blood hound/lab...which is what he is doing right this moment....
Long time no see
So ok, it's been a while. So sorry. Some of you are very diligent at making sure I don't go too long without a post. I really am appreciative of the concern you all have for our family during these difficult months here. A few weeks ago I thought I had broke the cycle and things were going to be better from here on out but then I had those two Friday's back to back with ambulance rides to the trauma center. Last Friday I managed to stay home, though too sick to have a Japanese food and movie night with the girls, but never had to go to the ER. I'm hoping this Friday will be another pass on these field trips.
I am having some good days and for these I am thankful. I still have issues with all these drugs and of course with every slip Dr. Judd changes the chemistry of the meds again and I have to go through all the adjusting. I had to have a talk with Dr. Judd after my last ER visit. I really just went to my regular physician and upon being unable to get my blood pressure and unable to do an EKG...add to this my heart rate was 144...the doctor called the ambulance to come get me. He was sure I was about to have a heart attack. The question that bothered me was they kept asking if I took street drugs. I gave this look like, your kidding right. They weren't. This ER visit was very entertaining...When I was first wheeled into the hall way there was this lady sittin on a bed that had a knife sticking out of her legs. That was freaky. Then I was in my little hole in the wall and still trying to handle the pain. The only meds the nurses are clear to give you in the ER without a doctors order is morphine...well I'm allergic to morphine. So guess what, I have to suffer till the doctor gets around to me. But as I lay in pain being as patient as possible...humming to myself and rocking back and forth.....this loud lady gets brought in to the room next to me. Actually our room connected so I could hear everything. The girls was from Charlotte, NC. Don't know why she was here, but she claimed over and over that she only had two glasses of red wine. It was only 3pm in the afternoon??? She apparently flipped her car in Bonsboro. If she said "I'm sorry" one more time I was going to pay a visit. She had a young nice looking cop at her side and apparently handcuffed to the bed. She refused to give blood.
She claimed to have no one to call but she did have an attorney she wanted to call before having any test of anything done. See that's backwards to me. I have plenty of people to call...no attorney though. She was still failing the breath test even after being there for almost 2 hours. She must have had WAY more than two glasses of wine. Anyway she kept Michael and I entertained.
The part I'm not liking about all this mental health stuff is every time I now go in and am sick...and in pain...if they can't find anything in my blood, urine, Ct scans, sonograms, xrays or whatever else they do...they tell me it's in my head. I don't think so. What do they think I enjoy these $600 rides across town every week? Seriously. My bed is much more comfortable. Not to mention I have two little girls that will brush my hair for hours on end. When they get tired, a little thing called...payment will keep them going. Anyway.
But that was the latest visit. The girls got their report cards the other days. I looked for the days missed. LeAnn missed 17 days this past nine weeks. Terra missed 11 days this past nine weeks. Mrs. Brown has been great though. I get their work done at home so...they do not get behind. I thought we would be getting better. We did the flu and pneumonia shots. Guess that didn't work. I feel so bad for these girls. I never had to worry about breathing when I was little. I could run, ride my bike do whatever I wanted and was never out of breath. We've been on preventatives since the Thanksgiving being spent in the hospital, and yet its not working. I don't know what else to do for them.
We had to get a new neb machine the other day. They have new ones out now that are shaped like animals. The girls picked this one that is a gator head!!! They picked it out all by themselves. How bought that! It's cute. They could have had a penguin, dog, bear but no they got the gator! It's cute. We also got a battery operated one. It is tiny. It can fit in my purse. This is great for us. We were in Roanoke at Build a Bear the Saturday after Christmas. The girls were doing fine and in a matter of minutes LeAnn could not breath. We used the converter in the van to plug into. But the converter burnt out. So we pulled over and I had to give one in the Target bathroom. Not the best places to be doing breathing treatments. But this battery operated will work when we're traveling or just out and about and can't find a outlet. It's just as fast as the wall unit too. We were excited about it!
Two more things that have been a blessing. My sister in Law had her baby girls Ilana Jordan Justice. I held her Sunday for 3 hours straight. I so wish I could have another baby. She is precious.
Second, my cousin Terra, whom Terra is named after, had her baby boy Tucker. He is still at the hospital. They live in Texas. She came out not breathing and purple. The doctors think her due date was off. So rather than him coming 4 weeks early, he was 9 weeks early. He has jaundice. He did have the tub come out from his throat and seems to be holding his own now. Terra and Stuart got to hold him for the first time a few days ago. He is expected to be in the NICU for another week and a half. Please pray that he will continue to improve and come home soon.
Well I don't know what else to say really. I know that many of you have been calling and I never answer the phone. I hate the phone. I really do. I'm sorry. I appreciate all the calls, cards, emails, dinner, prayers, visits and help. This has all been going on since September and you all have not missed a beat. I will try to update more. With us not getting to church due to my illness and then the girls going up and down with their health, I know it's hard for everyone to know how we are doing. I miss you all so much.
Many have been asking if I could give a specific prayer to pray. Like I said I am having some good days. Which I'm enjoying. If you all could just pray for motivation. Sometimes if I could just get past the lack of will, I might actually have more better days. Mornings are my toughest times. Generally speaking though I am up most days between 3-9pm. Not much but this is better than not getting up at all. So progress is being made.
Well I guess that's about it for me. Thanks again to everyone.
I am having some good days and for these I am thankful. I still have issues with all these drugs and of course with every slip Dr. Judd changes the chemistry of the meds again and I have to go through all the adjusting. I had to have a talk with Dr. Judd after my last ER visit. I really just went to my regular physician and upon being unable to get my blood pressure and unable to do an EKG...add to this my heart rate was 144...the doctor called the ambulance to come get me. He was sure I was about to have a heart attack. The question that bothered me was they kept asking if I took street drugs. I gave this look like, your kidding right. They weren't. This ER visit was very entertaining...When I was first wheeled into the hall way there was this lady sittin on a bed that had a knife sticking out of her legs. That was freaky. Then I was in my little hole in the wall and still trying to handle the pain. The only meds the nurses are clear to give you in the ER without a doctors order is morphine...well I'm allergic to morphine. So guess what, I have to suffer till the doctor gets around to me. But as I lay in pain being as patient as possible...humming to myself and rocking back and forth.....this loud lady gets brought in to the room next to me. Actually our room connected so I could hear everything. The girls was from Charlotte, NC. Don't know why she was here, but she claimed over and over that she only had two glasses of red wine. It was only 3pm in the afternoon??? She apparently flipped her car in Bonsboro. If she said "I'm sorry" one more time I was going to pay a visit. She had a young nice looking cop at her side and apparently handcuffed to the bed. She refused to give blood.
She claimed to have no one to call but she did have an attorney she wanted to call before having any test of anything done. See that's backwards to me. I have plenty of people to call...no attorney though. She was still failing the breath test even after being there for almost 2 hours. She must have had WAY more than two glasses of wine. Anyway she kept Michael and I entertained.
The part I'm not liking about all this mental health stuff is every time I now go in and am sick...and in pain...if they can't find anything in my blood, urine, Ct scans, sonograms, xrays or whatever else they do...they tell me it's in my head. I don't think so. What do they think I enjoy these $600 rides across town every week? Seriously. My bed is much more comfortable. Not to mention I have two little girls that will brush my hair for hours on end. When they get tired, a little thing called...payment will keep them going. Anyway.
But that was the latest visit. The girls got their report cards the other days. I looked for the days missed. LeAnn missed 17 days this past nine weeks. Terra missed 11 days this past nine weeks. Mrs. Brown has been great though. I get their work done at home so...they do not get behind. I thought we would be getting better. We did the flu and pneumonia shots. Guess that didn't work. I feel so bad for these girls. I never had to worry about breathing when I was little. I could run, ride my bike do whatever I wanted and was never out of breath. We've been on preventatives since the Thanksgiving being spent in the hospital, and yet its not working. I don't know what else to do for them.
We had to get a new neb machine the other day. They have new ones out now that are shaped like animals. The girls picked this one that is a gator head!!! They picked it out all by themselves. How bought that! It's cute. They could have had a penguin, dog, bear but no they got the gator! It's cute. We also got a battery operated one. It is tiny. It can fit in my purse. This is great for us. We were in Roanoke at Build a Bear the Saturday after Christmas. The girls were doing fine and in a matter of minutes LeAnn could not breath. We used the converter in the van to plug into. But the converter burnt out. So we pulled over and I had to give one in the Target bathroom. Not the best places to be doing breathing treatments. But this battery operated will work when we're traveling or just out and about and can't find a outlet. It's just as fast as the wall unit too. We were excited about it!
Two more things that have been a blessing. My sister in Law had her baby girls Ilana Jordan Justice. I held her Sunday for 3 hours straight. I so wish I could have another baby. She is precious.
Second, my cousin Terra, whom Terra is named after, had her baby boy Tucker. He is still at the hospital. They live in Texas. She came out not breathing and purple. The doctors think her due date was off. So rather than him coming 4 weeks early, he was 9 weeks early. He has jaundice. He did have the tub come out from his throat and seems to be holding his own now. Terra and Stuart got to hold him for the first time a few days ago. He is expected to be in the NICU for another week and a half. Please pray that he will continue to improve and come home soon.
Well I don't know what else to say really. I know that many of you have been calling and I never answer the phone. I hate the phone. I really do. I'm sorry. I appreciate all the calls, cards, emails, dinner, prayers, visits and help. This has all been going on since September and you all have not missed a beat. I will try to update more. With us not getting to church due to my illness and then the girls going up and down with their health, I know it's hard for everyone to know how we are doing. I miss you all so much.
Many have been asking if I could give a specific prayer to pray. Like I said I am having some good days. Which I'm enjoying. If you all could just pray for motivation. Sometimes if I could just get past the lack of will, I might actually have more better days. Mornings are my toughest times. Generally speaking though I am up most days between 3-9pm. Not much but this is better than not getting up at all. So progress is being made.
Well I guess that's about it for me. Thanks again to everyone.
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